


The End For You and Me

by FKAErinElric



Series: Cas and Dean a love story [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Episode: s05e04 The End, M/M, Mentions of prior relationship, mentions of drug use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-10-19 22:41:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17610404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FKAErinElric/pseuds/FKAErinElric
Summary: While in the endverse Dean decides to talk to endverse Cas about what happened to him.





	The End For You and Me

Dean stood there and looked at his future self. 2014, the world had ended apparently and here he was being a huge dick. Dean was well away he wasn’t the nicest man in the world but he would never shot a man in cold blood in front of his friends. Croaton or not it wasn’t right. Dean’s list of concerns was ever growing. He kept hoping and wishing that he would get sent back to his time. He eyed the other him who was packing for the mission. He licked his lips and asked a question that had been on his mind. “Are you, do you know that Cas is on drugs and having orgies?”

            The future him gave a shrug. “What Cas does is none of my business.” He folded up the map and shoved it in his bag.

            Dean frowned. “Dude really its Cas here.” He shook his head. “He’s clearly troubled man don’t you see that?”

            “Listen past me; it’s none of my business. Cas does what Cas wants to. I don’t care who he sleeps with or what he drinks or if he’s on pills. The world has ended half of this camp is strung out on something alight.” He slammed down his bag. “So my suggestion to you is to mind your damn business.”

            “Man I wonder when did I become such a dick.” He snapped at his future. He stormed out of the cabin. He thought he heard the other him shout something at him but he wasn’t in the mood for it. He looked around the camp that was milling around. He really only kind of knew two people here and that was Cas and Chuck. He put his hands in his pocket and decided he would go and talk to Cas. He wanted to; no he needed to know what on Earth had happened to the angel.

            He headed to the cabin that he met Cas in before assuming it was also his sleeping quarters. He knocked on the wall before walking through the bead door. He heard a halfhearted greeting and he walked in.

            Cas was sitting on the floor in the middle of cleaning his gun. Seeing the angel with a gun in his hand seemed weird. He looked up at him. He’s blue eyes wide and he gave a smile. “Hello Dean.” He sat down his gun. “You need something?”

            Dean sat down across from him. “I just wanted to talk.”

            He shook his head and gave a small smile. “Oh you want to talk to me.” He started to put his gun back together. “Seems strange now…”

            Dean noted how sad Cas sounded when he said that. “Yeah uh I wanted to talk to you about…” He looked at him Cas started him bright beautiful blue eyes. Dean denied it he knew it; he felt some attraction to Cas. The angel was beautiful and mysterious it got him going in ways he didn’t know was possible. He cleared his throat trying to clear his mind of his impure thoughts he had about the angel. He had a lot of questions but one that came to mind one that he could not shake since he seen his future self and him in the mission briefing. He looked at him and leveled with himself that this was Cas still Cas and he could talk to him. “What happened between you and me? I mean when I left you and I were becoming friends and I like that but geez man,” He gestured towards the door. “You and future me it’s like you guys hate each other.”

            Cas had finished reassembling the gun. He laid it down his blue eyes filled with such sadness it broke Dean’s heart. He chewed on his bottom lip and ran his hand through his hair. “I don’t think you’ll like my answer.”

            “Just tell me Cas.” He looked deep into his eyes. “I want to know so… so I can prevent whatever happened between us. God dude you’re in so much pain I can see it I don’t know why my future self is ignoring it but damn.”

            He sighed. “Well the angels they left, I’m sure you already knew that. When they did… I became human…” He folded his hands and laid them in his lap and it reminded Dean of meditation. “Dean I hate being a human. It’s awful, I stumbled through it… getting weaker and weaker every day… then,” He stared at the floor as if he didn’t want to meet Dean in the eyes. “The world got worse… Sam said yes to Lucifer you and I… we were broken people, broken sad and depressed. You lost your brother, Bobby, and I lost my powers. We were… searching for something any form of relief from the crippling depression.” He opened his eyes and looked at him. “I… Dean I have had feelings for you for a while, I knew this I never acted on it… angels and humans you see and well… no point in dwelling on that. We needed something we were vulnerable… I kissed you, I thought everything was ending anyways I had no heaven to go back to I was powerless I might as well enjoy it. Well one thing led to another and…”

            Dean felt his eyes widen he knew what that meant. “Cas are you saying you and I… had sex?”

            Cas nodded. “Yes well we made love.” He shook his head and smiled no doubt at that memory. “Best night of my life.”

            Dean felt like someone sucked the air out of his lungs. He banged Cas holy crap he actually had sex with a man! “I uh,”

            “I told you, you wouldn’t be happy with what you heard. Anyways, I had long loved you and wanted to keep loving you. I sought out a relationship with you. World ending or not I wanted to be with you…” He let out a small sob. “You didn’t want me.” He cried. He covered his face with his hands. “You told me that it was a one-time thing. That I was just… an item on your bucket list you didn’t want me. You wouldn’t touch me, look at me or anything. I begged, begged you to love me. I didn’t know what to do and you told me to do what I did to seek out women. That sex was just casual. I wasn’t a relationship to you I was something for you to bang.”

            “Oh my god Cas I’m sorry.” Dean reached out and laid his hand on his shoulder. “I am so sorry.” He’s heart was breaking as he watched this man cry. He moved his hand away and Cas moved in closer. Dean took him in his arms and held him. “I led you to this, I brought you to this point and I’m sorry.”

            “Don’t blame yourself…” He sniffed. “You didn’t do it; it happened a few years back or a few years in your future.” He buried his head in Dean’s shoulder and Dean rubbed his back.

            Dean wondered how he could make love to this man then leave him like that. Was he ashamed by it? How could he lead this man on? Love him and leave him. Cas was sobbing uncontrollable now. “Cas.” He whispered and ran his fingers through the other man’s black hair.

            “I just… Dean I wanted you to touch me, to touch me again.” He nuzzled his head in his chest. “I missed it I missed it so much. It was what I wanted. Those women mean nothing to me; I just wanted to get off to forget about you.” He looked up at him tears streaked down his face. “And when I say you I mean you, you not you now. I mean how you were.” He laid his head back down on him. “When you loved me… when you wanted and needed me.”           

            Dean rubbed his back and listened to the man cry. He’s heart was long broken. He vowed not to do this to Cas. “Cas, I promise you… when I get back to my time… if we… if we no when we,” He reached out and cupped the man’s face and stared into his eyes. “When we finally… you know… I will never leave you okay.”

            Cas gave a smile his soul had long been crushed by years of neglect from Dean. “All I want more than anything is you to love me.” He tilted his head, his blue eyes focused. “I love you Dean.” He leaned forward towards him.

            Dean realized that Cas was about to kiss him. He was about to stop him this wasn’t he’s Cas, no his Cas was back in his time standing on the side of the road waiting for him to get his sleep. But, this Cas was broken and hurt rejecting him might be the final move for this Cas. He was tittering on the edge of life Dean could see it he had seen desperate people before and Cas was well on his way to that. He didn’t stop him even though it was the wrong Cas. He felt the other man’s lips press against him. It was warm, he licked his lips and Dean opened his mouth to let him in. Cas tasted like booze and pills which wasn’t at all like he imagined. The former angel curled his fingers into Dean’s hair and pulled him closer. Minus the fact that this wasn’t the man he left at home and that he tasted of booze this was a really great kiss. Dean’s hand slipped up his shirt and he told himself to stop.

            Cas broke the kiss first and took Dean’s hand out of his shirt. “I’m flattered but I’m not the one you should be kissing.” He let him go and stood up. “Promise Dean when you get home… when you see your Cas please take care of him.” He laid his hand on his shoulder eyes full of love, lust and remorse. “I… love you so much and if something were to happen I couldn’t handle it. So please… take care of you and me.” The lingering hand left his shoulder and he picked up his gear bag. “Just don’t let the other you know that I told you about our past… he hates me enough as is.” He walked away and left Dean alone with his thoughts.

            Dean touched his lips that still tingled. He looked at the door that Cas left out of and made a note he had to talk to his Cas when he got home.

 

&&&&&

 

            When Dean was finally back in his own time he was never so grateful. He had so much to do, he had to call Sam and meet back up with him but… he had to deal with Cas. The angel in question had pulled him out of the motel room right as Zachariah had showed up. The other man looked at him, rumpled suit, messy hair, five o’clock shadow, intense blue eyes, and not strung out on pills his Cas. He laid a hand on him and said. “Don’t ever change.” He called Sam and told him where to meet him. Cas stayed by his side eyes on him as if studying him. After he finished the phone call he told Cas of everything that happened.

            “So in the future I turned to drugs?” Cas asked. He squinted his eyes and tilted his head, lips pursed and Dean thinks about kissing those lips again.

            “Yeah Cas, you were doing meditations, having orgies with chicks, and strung out on something.”

            Cas frowned. “What led me to such a life style?”

            “You became human… uh…” Dean looked around feeling nervous under Cas’s intense gaze. “We apparently had some relationship and I broke your heart.”

            Cas’s face turned bright red like a tomato. A truck blew by and made Dean feel cold. “We had a relationship?” He blinked a few times then looked away.

            Dean reached out to him. He felt like he needed to and his body wanted it. Bucket list or not he didn’t deny it Cas was kind of hot.

            “What are you doing?” Cas asked his voice rose in panic.

            Dean wasn’t exactly sure. Surely the side of the highway wasn’t the best place for this plus he needed to get back to the Impala and go meet up with Sam but he had to do this. He wrapped his arms around Cas. He was not surprised the angel didn’t return the hug.

            “Why are you squeezing me with your body?” The angel asked and Dean felt it in his chest.

            “It’s called a hug Cas.” He muttered in his hair. Slowly he felt the angel’s hands go up his back and hug him back. “There you go.”

            Cas nuzzled his head in his shoulder. “This is rather pleasant Dean.” He murmured

            Dean felt his heart warm. He pulled away and cupped Cas’s face as if to kiss him. He looked into his blue eyes to ask permission. Cas looked at him his expression bore that of concern. Dean had one chance at this but if it went wrong would he send Cas down the bad path? He thought of the End world Cas who cried in his arms and begged for his touch. Did Cas harbor those feelings now or was Dean just a human to him. Would a kiss be crossing the line? He really wished he asked the other Cas when he developed the angelic hard on for him. He titled Cas’s head up to hell with it; if the world was ending he could at least let this man experience a kiss before everything went south. He pressed his lips to his and not to his surprise Cas’s lips remained still and firm. He stopped the kiss romance gone out of his mind maybe Cas fell for him later and not now.

            Cas looked at him with confusion. He touched his lips and looked at Dean head titled. “Did you just kiss me?”

            “I did.” Dean said proudly. He kissed a guy and he liked it. “Well I got to go met up with Sam so uh.”

            “I flew us back about .2 seconds ago right before you laid your lips on mine.” He hand was still on his lips. “I’m going to go and look for the colt.” And poof he was gone right before Dean.

            “Freaking angels.” He grumbled to himself as he got in his car. It had been a long day he rubbed his eyes and started down the road. He shook his head and hoped he got a chance to do that again with Cas. He pushed in a cassette into the tape deck and cranked up the sound. No matter what though he was going to keep his promise to the end world Cas he had to. He clutched the steering wheel tight he had to.


End file.
